Review: Thief of Shadows by Elizabeth Hoyt

This was my first foray into the Maiden Lane series and I might have one more in me before I call it quits on Hoyt for good. What makes Hoyt catnip to my fellow reviewers makes me sneeze. I think we're far enough from the release date for me to freely make use of spoilers.

Thief of Shadows is one of those books where all the characters are very strongly something until suddenly they are not. Winter Makepeace is a dedicated teacher with a serious Batman complex. He runs around in an ornate, colorful costume and leaps on rooftops to ferret out enslaved children. His rationale for the elaborate disguise (striking fear into men's hearts) was a bit of a yawn. Leaving his attire aside, the rest of Winter Makepeace had promise. Through his dedication to the children a true conflict existed for him and Isabel. Unfortunately it takes just one nonconsensual blowjob for Winter Makepeace to forget everything he holds dear. Isabel sucks the character right out of him. Suddenly he's gone from swearing his life has been promised to a higher purpose to abandoning everything he once stood for. No longer is the need of the many (the orphans) greater than the need of the one (himself and a favored orphan). No longer are his nightly raids on criminals the calling he cannot set aside. Winter packs his bags and arrives at Isabel's house with boots made for knocking.

Isabel is no better. She's a flighty hedonist who refuses to bond with the child sharing her home. She orders him away and complains to the servants when she sees signs of him in her home. She works on the charity board for the orphanage but never spends time there. Her goals are a life in society filled with distractions. After sexually assaulting Winter she suddenly craves children and stability. By the end of the book Isabel has packed down her mansion and set up house in the orphanage by Winter's side. She's busy making it a home. No mention is made of the probable social cost because now Isabel has a makeshift family and therefore has satisfied all her life's desires. If I were Makepeace, I'd be worried about a sexual predator in a house of young men but then if I were Makepeace I'd have shoved her off a balcony instead of chasing her down and professing my love.

Along the way there is a tedious Pygmalion subplot even the characters fail to take seriously. There are a few Bad Guys and Even Worse Guys and a bit of Conspiracy keeping time for us so Isabel and Winter can pretend anything matters but getting naked. The plot points are so disposable that one involving a young jewish orphan is completely cast side once Winter buys his knocking boots. Presumably the concerns he had about taking her into a Christian Home are swept away by the clarity of passion. Or something. There's also this dude that wants the orphanage for REASONS and is thwarted by an old lady with a pile of slingshots. I don't know why he wouldn't just beat the crap out of our orphans, but he throws his hands up like a modern couple whose live in nanny has walked off in a huff. How can he manage these dirty, dirty children?

Hoyt keeps being recommended to me by people whose opinion I generally agree with. This is my second or third attempt at her. I do appreciate her ability to create distinct characters but I think she lacks follow through. I have another Maiden Lane book cued up on the old TBR but I'll stop there. It hurts my eyes when I roll them.

Review: To Beguile A Beast by Elizabeth Hoyt

(That's a pretty pixilated image, sorry about that one.)

Look! This was covered during the Headless Couple phase! It works because of the extreme war injuries the hero carries. Showing him in profile might seem like a cheat unless they showed the side with his eye sewn shut like a zebra rug. (Can't see that being a big seller outside the fetish market.) Since this is a 2009 release I'm going to go with some spoilers here. Be aware. 

Everyone (and I do mean everyone) I talk to about romance loves Elizabeth Hoyt. I do love a Beauty and the Beast tale, so I picked up To Beguile A Beast on it's release then promptly forgot about it. We're starting to rustle the bottom of the bag this month (since I can't lift anything heaver than a paperback) so I was reminded I had it. I'm hoping this isn't one of her most beloved works, because holy hockey sticks with a side of lemon wedges up the business!

On the plus side, her children are spot on. Kids are one of the harder things to include in a romance. Too much time on the page and you've got a straight up novel. Too little time on the page and they seem like accessories instead of family members. I give Hoyt extreme credit for having the kids just right on all levels. They don't seem that aware of their status as bastard children, but I suppose Mommy Earns Money By Having Sex isn't covered until you're older, at least if Mommy is good at it. So, Mommy and the Duke haven't had sex in a long time and Mommy isn't happy being kept in a cage, plus the Duke might be inclined to take the kids away, so Mommy's taking off for Scotland. 

Here is a missed opportunity. What if the Duke DID love his children? What if he's not a one dimensional monster? There's an interesting dilemma, but no, the Duke is icky and never sees the kids and only wants to use them as pawns on his chessboard. You've heard it all a thousand times in family court, but here it's actually true. So. Single mom, run down servant-less castle in Scotland, there's got to be a hero in the tower licking his wounds, right? Pretty soon she's licking them with him. It's a nice progression, the relationship is playing out well, the back story is unfolding, I'm getting the whole Hoyt Hype and then... Full stop. 

Daddy comes home. And he takes the kids to London. Everything falls apart. She's distraught, he's not sure he wants to get involved in their parenting drama. So far, so good. But when she explains that the Duke doesn't want the kids, Hero Boy is back in. Taking her word for it and all, they hasten to London where the Duke tells her that she can have the kids if she comes back to him. While this proves his tool status, it doesn't make much sense. How did he go from "Wow, she's going to pay for leaving me!" to this dude? Wouldn't she suffer more if she came back just in hopes of the kids? Or hey, no kids for you ever? He's not a big thinker, our Big Bad Duke. 

While we recover from that screeching halt to the Duke having a plan, there's another twist coming. Turns out all they have to do to get the kids back, the kids that the Duke has gone out of his way to obtain, is get the Duke to lie about their parentage. That's it. Once the Duke fails to claim them in front of the King, all the danger is past. Now I don't know about you but if I had an angry ex stalking me with all the fury of the deranged, I don't think he'd be put off so easily. King or not. What does the King care about this ex-mistress, even if she is hooked up with one of his favorite authors? What's the King going to do to the Duke if he kills the chick on the side? How about if he abducts the kids a few months later? I'm just not feeling this resolution. "You will never be free of me, I will hunt you down forever and make you pay, oh wait. My bad. We're good. Have a nice life."

I dunno. I see the bones for the Hoyt Fever here, but I'm not on board. I think I'll try a bit of Maiden Lane anyway. Can a bajillion readers be wrong? Or just wrong for me? We'll find out. 

Review: An Unlikely Countess by Jo Beverley

*Why can't we have eyes anymore? I feel like this cover is saying "Hello! Up here!" to the Art Department. 

Rothgar, it's time to go. I adore you, you are one of the great romantic heros, you make other romantic heros look like pale anemic vampires, but I think we need to take a break. Here's the thing, I loved An Unlikely Countess, I adored An Unlikely Countess, I was ready sleep with An Unlikely Countess under my pillow, and then your wife showed up. She was kind of a total buzz kill.

This book was so good without her. It was Joanna Bourne good. It was Sherry Thomas good. It was Meredith Duran good. Hey, I'll go all the way - it was Jo Beverley good. And then it was easy. The thing is, Cate (can I call the Earl Cate?) was a great romantic lead on his own. His family doesn't understand him, his mother can't really stand him, his older brother is a know it all bore, and Cate likes to rescue girls he finds in alleys. He's adorable. Sure, he's got a bit of an inferiority complex, being suited to caretake a manor and finding himself without one, but that's totally not a problem.

Then there's Prudence! She's a total snob and I love that she can still be one after falling so far down in the world that up would be defined as a change of clothes. That whole thing she's got going with her neighbor? Will tutor for food? Love her! As an older sibling myself, believe me when I say I've got her back. Younger brothers can be the very devil. Look at Cate! By the time the two of them find themselves shacked up as Earl and Countess I'm fascinated. The intricacies of upstairs / downstairs life, the dizzying tightrope of small town life, the nuances of family dynamics. I love that stuff. It was like Downton Abbey with half the cliches.

Then the drama had to escalate. And with the drama, a sudden resolution of all their problems, some of it initiated by a certain overbearing nobleman's charismatic wife. I'm not naming any names, Rothgar, but I think you know her. Really really well if you get where I'm going with this. Really. Well. Indeed. Yes. Her. She shows up and it's like a giant tying of the plot lines. I liked it better when Cate and Prudence were muddling on as best they could, without the big jolt of charisma. And really, if you sponsor all the lame little ducks, aren't you going to start to get a reputation for it? Rothgar, Lord of the Ducklings and Holder of the Socially Unformed. It's a bit of a mouthful.

Ah, why am I blaming you? You weren't even there. Probably, when you heard about it, you didn't even approve. Ok, you're right, you can stay. In fact, you can show up in every book of your time period ever. Because you're awesome. And so were Cate and Prudence, before A Certain Person cast them in her shadow. Can't you talk to her? Well I was just asking. No need to get like that about it. Fine! I'll read the next one. But I'm not promising to change my mind.